The Eurovision Sock Contest
The Eurovision Sock Contest
So my mistress has once again entered me as a judge in the Eurovision Sock Contest. I am honoured, but at the same time terrified. It is a huge responsibility for a mere footslave such as myself – to have to ‘judge’, and mark, the socks of superior, mistresses live in front of a television audience of millions – it really is an awesome thought!
And I have another reason to be nervous – if my top vote doesn’t concur with that of the television audience at home - in other words if I fail to choose the overall winner – I shall be whipped live on air at the end of the Contest whilst being forced to kneel at the feet of the winner.
I therefore have every right to feel nervous.
We are down to the final 4 rounds of the Contest, and myself and my five fellow, male footslave-judges now have six remaining pairs of female, socked feet to judge. I happen to be the first slave-judge in the line at the start of the competition, and so, as I kneel on the stage with my head humbly bowed at the feet of the first, female competitor, who is sitting above me on a high bar-stool, her feet resting on a metal rim at the base of the stool, I can observe out of the corner of my eye a row of five other pairs of pretty, feminine feet resting on bar stools to my right, with five other kneeling footslave-judges at their respective feet.
We judges shall all have to work our way down the line for each of the four remaining rounds of the contest – judging the young women’s socked feet on firstly ‘General Aesthetics’ i.e. overall appearance (sight); ‘Texture of sock’ (touch); ‘Aroma of sock’ (smell); and finally ‘Flavour of sock’ (taste).
All the female contestants are free, young women in their early twenties. All the male ‘judges’ (myself included) are footslaves in their forties. We know our stuff, but trying to second guess how the television audience will vote is always problematical – given that the audience at home is a mixture of mistresses and slaves, and given also that they can only see the contestants’ feet and the slaves’ reactions to them – the TV audience can’t actually feel, smell or taste the young women’s socked feet as we slave-judges can!
Which is why the first round is always the most critical – trying to judge how the television audience at home will view the overall appearance of the socked feet. Remember – if I don’t choose the overall winner, I shall be whipped at her feet!
Round 1 – General Aesthetics
‘General Aesthetics’. It is, of course, a play on words (‘General Anaesthetic’?) – but for a humble slave-judge such as myself it is no laughing matter. It is arguably the most important round – deciding which feminine sock and shoe, boot or sandal combination looks the most appealing.
This year we have six very different styles and combinations to choose from. The first pair of feminine feet I must judge are the pair resting on the metal base of the first bar stool directly in front of my kneeling face – some lacy, white, cotton ankle socks in a pair of strappy, bright red, high-heeled, peep-toe sandals belonging to a young, white woman with bright, red hair to match her bright, red sandals.
As I focus my attention on the red and white sandal and sock combo, I can’t help feeling that these, pretty, shapely, frilly-ankle-socked feet will go down well with the viewers at home. Socks and heels – always a stunning and exciting combination! Shades of ‘tartiness’? Of arrogance? Of danger perhaps? The seeming purity of the pristine, white socks contrasted with the wanton lustfulness of the spiked-heels? And the wearing of peep-toe sandals with socks is always intriguing for the humble footslave – exactly why has the mistress chosen to wear socks with open-toed sandals at all? Presumably just to humiliate her slave by denying him the sight of her beautiful, painted, bare toes – for she hardly needs to wear socks with such ‘summery’ footwear just to keep her feet warm! If her feet and toes were cold wouldn’t she wear a pair of closed shoes or boots with her pretty, white, lacy socks?
And that lace – that frill around the ankle. It all adds feminine power to the pure, white sock – for it is a clear statement of the limits to which the slave’s eyes can wander. A humble, male footslave must keep his eyes below the frills at the top of his mistress’s ankle socks. They are a reminder to him of the extent of his remit – her lower sock.
Yes – based on overall aesthetics, these are already my favourites, or, at least, I sense that they will be the favourites of the viewing audience. And as I observe some tiny creases and folds in the white, frilly socks around the mistress’s shapely ankle bones I am reinforced in this opinion. The television cameras will no doubt be focusing in on the socks and will have picked up on those endearing little imperfections in the otherwise smart and pristine, white ankle socks, just as I have done.
I am already pretty much convinced that I shall be awarding these white, lacy ankle socks my top marks for appearance – 12 points.
The voting system goes as follows: each slave-judge awards 12 points for the pair of socked feet he deems the best in each round; then 10 points for the second best; 8 points for the third etc. all the way down to 2 points for his least favourite.
Unlike with the Eurovision Song Contest, however, a slave-judge can never award ‘nuls points’ – a slave could never award a mistress no points!
I only get two minutes to study each pair of socked feet, such is the pace of modern, televised shows these days, and so at the blowing of a whistle by the glamorous, evening-gowned and strappy-golden-sandalled, female compere each slave-judge, including myself, has to shuffle on their hands and knees down to the neighbouring bar stool in order to study the next pair of female, socked feet.
I don’t pay much attention to the activities of my six fellow-judges. It’s every male slave-judge for himself in a contest like this. We all have a vested interest in correctly identifying the audience’s choice of winner – for those of us who fail to do so shall, as I have already indicated, be di-vested of our slave-shirts and soundly whipped!
Seated on the second bar stool above me is what appears to be a dark-haired, young woman of oriental appearance wearing knee-length, zip-up, brown leather kitten-heeled boots with yellow, spiral-patterned, knee-length bootsocks protruding out the tops.
It is a bold choice of footwear for the young woman to choose – at least as far as this first round of ‘General Aesthetics’ is concerned - for only the very tops of her pretty, yellow socks are visible to slave-judge and audience. Nevertheless, the distinctive spiral-patterning of the stitching in the socks is extremely eye-catching and quite clever: not only does the slave-judge feel somewhat guilty at having to raise his gaze so high up the young, oriental woman’s brown-leather-booted leg in order to view the tops of her yellow socks, he is also left longing to trace the pattern of the spiral stitching with his slave-nose down the entire length of the sock. That will auger well for the second round – the ‘Texture’ round – when the slave-judges are permitted to feel the superior, young women’s socks with their slave faces and noses.
Yes, this young, oriental woman could be a bit of a dark horse – the inscrutable mysteries (or should that be mistress-eries) of the Far East! Sock largely hidden inside boot – but a lot of sock! Knee-length sock! And bright yellow too!
One to watch!
The blowing of the whistle means that I must reluctantly shuffle down to the next bar stool and the next pair of feminine feet – the feet of a black girl clad in a very sporty pair of bright, white, calf-length tube socks with two fetching, red hoops on each of the elasticated tops, and plain, white keds. The choice of footwear by this young, black woman is very clever, for the white tube socks contrast nicely with the rich blackness of the skin on her shapely calf muscles.
In fact, the white socks probably aren’t so bright as they first appear. It’s important to remember that none of the female contestants will have washed their socks for several days as they will want to make a memorable and lasting impression on the noses of the slave judges when it comes to the ‘Aroma’ round.
Being pathetic footslaves, of course, we will always judge the stinkiest socks to be the best, and the female contestants will go to great lengths to ensure their socks smell – long runs in the park in the days leading up to the contest; workouts in the gym etc. I am sure that this ultra fit and healthy, sporty-looking young black woman will have been working-out, and that her thick tube socks will smell strongly of her precious footsweat when she takes off her keds. Her red and white tube socks not only look great on her beautiful, black legs, they will also feel, smell and taste wonderful.
A strong contender!
The fourth mistress is a beautiful, tall blonde, almost certainly of Scandinavian origins, who is wearing a very fetching pair of short, white sneaker-socks with a pink trim and matching pink and white, lace-up sneakers. She appears to be wearing very short matching pink and white shorts as well, but clearly I am unable to completely confirm that as I am a footslave and must concentrate on the tall, blonde woman’s sneakers and socks, not her well-proportioned legs.
It’s a classic combination always sure to win votes – sneakers and socks – although the length of the socks appears to get shorter and shorter over the years. It is literally just the pink trim and the tiniest slither of white sock that is visible above the upper rim of her pink and white sneakers, and both socks disappear completely at the back of her foot inside the heels of her sneakers!
Again this provides a sense of awe and mystery for the humble footslave-judge – a longing to see the rest of the socks in the knowledge that they are being worn for really one purpose only – to absorb the mistress’s footsweat thereby making her soft, feminine feet even more comfortable inside her soft, feminine sneakers.
Pink and white socks with pink and white sneakers – a girl can’t really go wrong with those!
As far as I’m concerned, however, the fifth pair of feet eclipse all the others that I have been privileged to examine thus far – soft, black ballet flats with bow-shaped laces on the tops, combined with black, cotton ankle socks with a white logo running along the entire length of the young woman’s shapely instep. She appears to be Indian – truly petite compared to the former Scandinavian contestant, yet being seated as she is on a bar-stool high above me she seems like a veritable giantess, as indeed do all the other contestants.
The soft, black ballet-shoe/soft, black ankle sock combo gets me every time! It’s a winner – businesslike yet simultaneously very feminine and ladylike. And this young ‘businesswoman’ is such a tease and a sock-flirt! Her soft, low-cut, flat ballet-style shoe is dangling from her foot, fully exposing her black ankle sock to my close-up view, and in particular that intriguing white logo running along her instep.
It consists of lettering which I can’t quite make out. But that’s not what is so intriguing about it – it’s the fact that the white lettering is smudged; smudged by repeated washing and/or sweat-absorption from the young Asian mistress’s foot. It provides a clear indication of repeated wear – as do the little balls of black, sock lint and the hint of thinning stitching along the bottom edge of the sock. These feminine, black socks are a well-worn and favourite pair – steeped in history; the history of where their owner has been standing, walking and running over many weeks and months, and in the chemicals from the insides of the hot, sweaty boots and shoes she has worn with them.
These are the real, working socks of a real, working woman. They are undoubtedly my personal favourites – but will the television audience think the same? Will they appreciate the flirtatious and well-used, black ankle socks as much as I do?
Finally I find myself kneeling in front of the sixth pair of female socks – thick, black, scrunched-up bootsocks with heavy, ribbed stitching peeping over the tops of a pair of zip-up, block-heeled and round-toed, black leather ankle boots. Once again, it has to be said, the owner is taking a slight risk. Only the tops of the socks are visible for this first ‘aesthetics’ round – and, remember, it is primarily the socks we are judging as opposed to the outer footwear, beautiful and dominant though the ankle boots are.
Having said that, these socks will undoubtedly score well in the ‘Texture’ round as we footslave-judges will be able to bury our noses in the deep creases and folds of the socks. They should smell nice too having been confined inside the young, white woman’s black ankle-boots - probably for several days on the trot! Which is an appropriate turn of phrase given that the young woman looks somewhat ‘horsey’ and ‘snooty’. She, more than the others, appears to be looking down her pierced nose at me like I am some sort of offending dirt attached to the sole of her nice, black ankle boot. Which, of course, I am.
I’m guessing this brunette may be the English contestant.
And so, round 1 is at an end. I now have to write down my marks for each contestant in my slave-judge’s notebook which will be passed to the female adjudicators at the end of the contest. Although my own undoubted favourites in this round were the black ankle socks with the smudged, white logo of the young, Indian mistress, I decide that the television audience is likely to go for the white, lacy socks and red sandals combo of the first contestant and, just between you and me, I therefore vote as follows:
Lacy, white ankle socks and red spike-heeled, peep-toe sandals – 12 points
Black ankle socks with white logos and black ballet-flats – 10 points
Red and white tube socks and plain, white keds – 8 points
Spiral patterned, yellow, knee-length bootsocks and brown, leather, zip-up boots – 6 points
Short pink and white sneaker socks and pink and white sneakers – 4 points
Thick, scrunched-up, black, ankle-length bootsocks and black, block-heeled, round-toed ankle boots – 2 points.
Round 2 – Sock Texture
And so we move on to round two and I am starting this time at the feet of the sixth contestant – the one whom thus far (unbeknown to her – mercifully) I have voted last with only 2 points – the snooty English girl with the thick, black bootsocks and black ankle boots.
She will do better in this round, however, for this is where the boots, shoes and sandals come off and the socks of those female contestants wearing boots are in full view for the first time.
It is also the round where the humble footslave judges get to take off the footwear of whichever female contestant happens to be seated above them at the start of the second round.
Although I voted her in last place in the first round, I feel honoured and privileged to be allowed to divest this haughty young Englishwoman of her black, zip-up ankle boots. Unzipping a young woman’s boots and revealing her hitherto largely hidden bootsocks is always much more of a thrill than removing sandals or slip-on shoes when the socks have already been fully on display. It’s that sense of anticipation – of the unknown. The bootsocks might appear to be plain black in colour judging from the elasticated, scrunched-up tops of the socks, but what if they contain brightly-coloured logos on the insteps (like the Indian girl’s ankle socks – I still can’t get her socks out of my slave-mind), or different coloured, reinforced toe and/or heel sections?
I find my hands are shaking somewhat with the excitement as I unzip the young Englishwoman’s black, leather ankle-boots and gently pull them off to reveal a pair of plain, black bootsocks. No logos! No colours! Just plain black!
My initial disappointment dissipates somewhat, however, the more I study the stitching of the black, ankle-length bootsocks. As on the scrunched-up tops, the thick, ribbed stitching runs all the way down the socks as far as the reinforced toe and heel areas. As I place my slave-nose on her right socked foot in order to conduct the ‘texture’ test, I am therefore able to run my nose quite literally down a thick groove in her sock all the way from the elasticated top to her toes. It feels nice, but not as nice as when I literally bury my footslave-nose in the deep folds of the scrunched-up tops of her socks. As I had earlier anticipated, the softness of the thick socks feels simply wonderful on my nose and face – and, although it is not yet the sock-smelling round, the aroma coming from the sweat-drenched bottoms of her thick, black bootsocks is quite entrancing!
All in all, a nice pair of sweaty bootsocks. ‘Top-ho!’ as the English say!
I next have to move along again to the first pair of socked feet lined up on the stage – the frilly, white ankle socks – now divested by one of my fellow-judges of their tarty, red, peep-toe and spike-heeled sandals.
The white socks look and feel glorious on their own – very thin compared to the thick, black bootsocks I have just been nuzzling, but there is something nice about being able to feel a young woman’s bare foot flexing underneath your nose as you run it along the thin, cotton material of her white sock. Perhaps she is finding it soothing; or perhaps even ticklish having her socked feet ‘nosed’ by a humble footslave? Whichever the case she is clearly finding the experience pleasurable as she seems to push her socked instep forward into my face, and her pleasure is my pleasure!
Speaking of ticklish, the lacy frills of this particular mistress’s socks tickle my nose as I nuzzle them, and for one terrifying moment I think I am about to sneeze! Mercifully I manage to suppress it – sneezing all over a female contestant’s nice, clean, white socks is never a good idea for a footslave-judge!
Next it’s the long, yellow, knee-length, bootsocks with the spiral-patterned stitching. It really is the stitching that sets these socks apart. One could literally close ones eyes and still be able to trace the spiral pattern down the entire length of the sock with ones nose.
I know that for a fact because that’s precisely what I do. It is, after all, the best way to concentrate on the feel and texture of the sock – close your eyes, block off your nose, and just run the sensitive tip of your slave-nose along the spiral grooves of the stitching. It gets a little bit awkward when the spiral pattern wraps around the back of the young oriental woman’s calves, but she appears to help me by twisting her leg around a bit to enable my nose to maintain purchase on the groove in the sock.
Well, it is in the young woman’s own best interests that the slave-judge should enjoy the feel of the back of her sock as well as the front – assuming she wants to win the contest!
The red and white, calf length, tube socks are next – again plenty of thick sock to nuzzle, only this time they are fully pulled-up and smooth on the young black woman’s shapely, athletic-looking shins and calf-muscles. I can’t help myself from tracing my nose around each stretched, red hoop at the top of her socks. I know it will make good television, and it demonstrates that I am taking my judging-role seriously as I need to know whether the smart, red hoops feel any different under my slave nose to the rest of the, otherwise white, socks. Having ‘nosed’ the red hoops I once again find a groove in the thick, white stitching that I can run my nose down all the way to the smelly, reinforced area of the athletic black girl’s sock-covered toes.
I see some yellow and brown staining on the material of the socks immediately beneath her toes. Sweat! The cameras will like that - and the sight of my slave-nose running over the sock sweat.
In contrast to the two previous pairs of socks I am next confronted with the ultra short, pink and white ‘footie’ socks of the tall blonde girl. Although the socks are small, her feet are quite large, so there is more sock material to nose-feel than might at first appear.
Rather like with the frilly, white socks of the first contestant I can feel the muscles in the young Scandinavian woman’s bare, white foot flexing beneath her thin, white sneaker sock. The base of the sock, in particular, feels nice and smooth – lint free, even though my nose causes the sock material to crease and wrinkle somewhat as I run it along the sole of her socked foot, from shapely big toe to equally shapely heel. Is that an area of rough skin I can feel on the base of her heel underneath the thin, white sock?
If so, the tall, blonde Scandinavian mistress will get extra points!
And so finally in this round it’s back to my favourites – the flirtatious black and white, well-worn, ankle socks of the petite, twenty-something, Indian mistress. As I nuzzle the white logo on her shapely instep I wonder what this young woman does for a living? Perhaps an office worker of some description? I am convinced she must, on occasion, wear these socks (and, indeed, in all probability her black ballet-flats with the bow-shaped laces on the tops of the soft, rounded toe areas) to her place of work. These are classic office girl socks – I can almost smell the office on them (although that is for the next round!)
I still can’t make out the wording of the white logo along the Indian girl’s instep, but I am in any case distracted by the delightful feel of the little, rough balls of black sock lint all along the side and bottom of her sock. I make a mental note to try and lick off some of this sock lint when it comes to the sock-tasting round. Being able to savour some of her black sock lint will better enable me to judge the taste of this Indian goddess’s socks!
My voting for this, the sock-texture, round is as follows:
Indian girl’s black and white ankle socks – 12 points
Brunette English girl’s thick, black, scrunched-up, ankle-length bootsocks – 10 points
Oriental girl’s spiral-patterned, yellow, knee-length bootsocks – 8 points
Black girl’s sporty, red and white, calf-length, tube socks – 6 points
Blonde Scandinavian girl’s short, thin, pink and white sneaker socks – 4 points (the feel of her hard skin on the base of her heels through the thin material of her short, sneaker-sock sadly not enough to beat the sporty, black girl’s groovy tube socks)
Red-haired girl’s white, frilly ankle socks – 2 points (they lost points because the frilly lace around her ankles tickled my nose and almost made me sneeze all over them on live television!)
Round 3 – Sock Aroma
I had found it quite difficult not to allow my sense of smell to interfere with my sense of touch during the second round, but now at last we slave-judges were free to audibly sniff the socks of the respective six, beautiful, female finalists with wild abandon!
I have to say I am delighted to be starting with the black and white office socks of the sweet and flirtatious Indian mistress. The compere reminds us judges that we are required to audibly sniff each and every socked foot, and that we must help the viewers at home by demonstrating through our facial expressions our personal footslavish-assessments of the stinkiness of the contestants’ socks – the more pained and disgusted our expressions, the smellier the socks (which is deemed a good thing!)
For my part I am absolutely determined to help my Indian mistress – my favourite – to win this round by feigning total disgust on my face as I sniff the socked instep on her right foot. In actuality the sock doesn’t smell all that bad – but, being so obviously well-worn, it looks smelly, so my turned up nose for the benefit of the cameras helps to reinforce the illusion for the viewing public back home.
I find myself wishing I could sniff the insides of the young Indian woman’s discarded, soft, leather ballet flats, as I am convinced the sweat from her feet will be deeply ingrained in the inner lining. Her shoes, like her socks, have the appearance of being well-worn – lots of tiny creases in the fabric of the soft leather, and the black inner linings do look suitably stained.
But sadly it is only the smell of the socks that I am allowed to judge, and so I make the most of the two minutes I am allocated to smelling the Indian, office girl’s sweaty, black socks whilst she is still wearing them.
I may be imagining it, but I’m sure I can feel some tiny balls of sock-lint being vacuumed up the insides of my slave-nostrils as I forcibly sniff! What bliss, to think that this superior young woman’s dirty sock lint is inside my humble nose!
Next in line, of course, are the thick, black, scrunched-up, ankle-length bootsocks of the imperious English girl. I had noticed that one of my fellow judges had appeared to really enjoy sniffing these particular socks, even letting out a little groan of pleasure mixed with disgust at the smell (something which is actually against the competition rules – slave-judges are not allowed to speak or to utter any sounds – but I don’t think anyone will be lodging a formal complaint on this occasion!)
As I bury my nose in the folds around the toe area of the English mistress’s right sock I can understand why my footslave-judge colleague felt compelled to moan – the sock smells truly rank! But then, why should we be surprised at that! The sock has, after all, in all probability been confined inside the young woman’s ankle boot for several, consecutive days – and deliberately so. She has deliberately cultivated this cheesy aroma to impress the slave-judges and to leave them with a lasting memory of her.
My slave-nose, for one, will not quickly forget the smell of haughty, young Englishwoman’s black-socked foot!
At least, not until my sniff of the next pair of socked feet – back to the start of the line and the redhead’s white, lacy socks.
I’m afraid to have to say that this young woman has rather let herself down in this round – her socks don’t smell at all! Presumably she didn’t have the foresight to wear closed boots or shoes with her white, thin cotton, lacy, ankle-length socks over the past few days, and instead has been running around (or more likely out clubbing) in her bright red, peep-toe, high-heeled sandals – sandals which, sadly, allow her feet to breathe – just what you don’t want when you are taking part in a sock-smelling competition!
Gallantly, I try to help her by feigning disgust as I audibly sniff the reinforced stitching covering the toes on her outstretched, right foot – but I don’t think I’m fooling anyone, least of all myself!
And so it’s with some relief that I move on to the spiral-patterned, yellow kneesocks of the oriental girl. Inevitably, because her socks have been encased inside her brown, knee-length, zip-up, leather boots for so long, even if the top half of her socks don’t smell sweaty, the lower parts do – the parts covering her actual feet and toes. She kindly wiggles her yellow-socked toes to help release some of the stink up my nose, and it is a good sign that my slave-nose doesn’t actually have to touch her sock to be enveloped in its cheesy, vinegary aroma.
My nose is in seventh heaven!
It’s the red and white tube socks of the next contestant - the sporty, black girl –that I am really looking forward to, however. I had already noted in the previous round that there were visible signs of yellowy-brown sweat staining on the undersides of the toes on the young, black woman’s otherwise pristine, white socks, and my nose accordingly heads straight for the stain – like a bee to honey; like a moth to the flame!
Yes! The familiar (for a footslave) aroma of stale footsweat. Unlike her red-haired counterpart, this female contestant has undoubtedly prepared well for the sock-sniffing element to the Eurovision Sock Contest! She must have been working out in the gym, and/or running mini-marathons, in her red and white tube socks and white, canvas keds – for her sports socks smell as a young woman’s sports socks should: they stink!
Genuine disgust is etched on my face. I do hope the cameras are picking this up! This young woman is the clear winner in this round – even though I still have one last pair of feminine socks to sniff – the short, thin, pink and white sneaker socks of the tall, Scandinavian girl.
My main impression of her socks is that they smell of the rubber lining of her sneakers – hot and warm, yes, but not particularly sweaty! It’s a bit of a disappointment really, especially after the pungent, vinegary smell of the black, female athlete’s tube socks.
Not much more I can say really!
And so my voting in the third ‘aroma’ round is as follows:
Black girl’s tube socks – 12 points
Indian girl’s black and white ankle socks – 10 points
Oriental girl’s spirally, yellow knee-socks – 8 points
English girl’s scrunched-up, black bootsocks – 6 points
Redhead’s frilly, white ankle socks – 4 points
Scandinavian girl’s short, pink and white sneaker socks – 2 points.
Round 4 – Sock Flavour
And so to the fourth and final round, when the slave-judges are afforded the inestimable privilege of actually peeling off the contestant’s socks with our slave-teeth and placing them in our mouths in order to taste them.
It’s a round which, in some respects I’ve been dreading – not because I don’t relish the taste of a superior, young woman’s dirty socks in my slave-mouth; far from it! It’s just that I don’t relish the taste of another slave’s saliva on a mistress’s sock – and, inevitably, the only socks I can be guaranteed sucking on first before any of the other slave-judges are those of the contestant in front of me at the start of this round (i.e. the Scandinavian sneaker-socked girl) – although in all likelihood the fellow slave-judge in front of me will only taste one of the adjacent contestant’s socks , leaving me with the hope that I will also be the first to taste at least one of my beloved Indian mistress’s, well-worn black and white ankle socks! The very thought of another slave getting to suck on her sock-sweat before me fills me with slavish envy, a most unbecoming emotion in a slave!
But for now I have first to suck on one of the blonde, Scandinavian girl’s short, white sneaker socks.
I must first peel off both her socks from her pretty, if quite large, feet. As I have already indicated, slave-judges are required to peel off the lady-contestants’ socks with their teeth, so I probably have the easiest job of all my fellow judges – gently wrapping my lips around the toe ends of my blonde, Scandinavian mistress’s ultra-short, pink and white sneaker-socks and pulling them of with my slave-mouth.
Imagine having to pull off the oriental girl’s yellow kneesocks with your teeth! Much of your sock-tasting time would be wasted just trying to remove the socks!
I put the Scandinavian girl’s left sock in my mouth and suck on it. A bit bland – a little bit salty, but really not much of a taste if truth be told; just the flavour of soft, white cotton. I also like a young woman’s sock to really fill my mouth – and this sock just isn’t big enough for my tastes – despite the young woman’s relatively large feet!
Next I move down to the Indian girl’s feet. I can’t help noticing that her bare, brown feet are particularly pretty – her toenails, for example, are painted bright purple. I like a girl who makes her personal footslave paint her toenails and then cover up his painstaking work with her socks!
It is quite clear to me which of the discarded, crumpled up, black and white ankle socks the preceding slave-judge has tasted, for I can see the dark saliva stains on the black fabric of the relevant sock. I therefore pick up the other, as yet unsampled sock, and place it in my mouth.
It tastes much more salty than the Scandinavian girl’s white sneaker-sock, but to be fair that may be because I a sucking much harder on he Indian girl’s sock – I am determined to suck off the little balls of sweaty, black sock lint; to savour them on my tongue before swallowing them – for this is the office sock-lint of a superior Indian goddess and it truly belongs in my inferior mouth and stomach! I feel I could survive on nothing but her sock sweat and sock lint! A footslave doesn’t need much to sustain and nourish him!
It is food from the sole!
All too soon I have to extract the Indian girl’s well-worn, but now pre-washed dirty sock from my slave-mouth, in order to move on to the next mistress’s socks – the thick, black bootsocks of the English girl.
These socks fill the mouth nicely. Even just one bootsock is enough to provide a humble, sock-sucking footslave with an overflowing mouthful of girl-sock, and the soft texture of the thick stitching feels nice on my slave-tongue. Unfortunately, the sock doesn’t taste quite as salty or as vinegary as I had been expecting – possibly because it was already quite damp when I picked it up. One of my fellow foot-judges has already enjoyed a mouthful of the English girl’s socksweat!
On a side issue I notice that the English girl’s toenails are painted black, and I begin to wonder if she is a goth.
If so, she gets extra points in my book!
And so from goth to tart! Perhaps a little bit unkind, but the redhead’s initial combo of bright, red, spike-heeled, open-toed sandals and frilly, white ankle socks has given me the impression right from the start of a certain ‘tartiness’. A cheap frill, so to speak. The fact that her toenails are painted bright red to match her red high-heeled sandals somehow only serves to reinforce my first, in no way meant to be judgemental, impressions.
Not that her white, lacy ankle sock tastes at all ‘tarty’ in my mouth as I suck on it. I hadn’t expected it to – after all, it hadn’t smelt tarty either. The sweat hasn’t been sucked out of this sock by the preceding judges – there never was any sweat to begin with!
Disappointing!
I am becoming quite the sock-tasting critic and connoisseur as I move on to the yellow, knee-length bootsocks of the oriental mistress. Being a knee-length sock, not all of it fits into my slave-mouth – big though that is! I therefore look ridiculous as the upper end of the chosen kneesock hangs out of my mouth as I suck on the more flavoursome toe and foot end of the sock.
It’s a funny thing, but one can almost taste the different colours in young women’s socks! I suppose there could be something in the various chemicals of the different-coloured dyes, but it’s probably just a figment of my footslave-imagination. Nevertheless, I can’t help feeling that the yellow sock tastes somewhat…well...’lemony’!
Is that possible? Could it even be that the oriental mistress has sprayed some lemon-scented perfume on her yellow socks to impress the footslave-judges? Or are my taste buds just becoming confused with the mingling aftertastes of 5 very different feminine socks swirling around on my stupid, ignorant footslave-palate?
Whatever, I find the oriental girl’s yellow kneesock quite refreshing in my mouth – almost like a lemony-flavoured pudding after the main course.
And after the pudding, of course, comes the cheese and biscuits – the cheese being the cheesy, sweaty taste of the beautiful, young black woman’s tube sock; the biscuits being the little bits of black toe-jam that I am sure I can feel coming off her red and white tube sock and onto my tongue as I suck voraciously on the last remaining sweat in her already well-sucked sock!
And so to my final round of votes:
Oriental girl’s ‘lemony-flavoured’ socks – 12 points (I do have a sweet tooth for a sweet sock!)
Indian girl’s lint-covered black and white ankle sock – 10 points (an excellent main course! My compliments to the Indian chef!)
Black girl’s cheesy, tube sock – 8 points (sweaty cheese and chewy, toe-jam flavoured biscuits – a nice way to finish off a meal!)
English girl’s thick, black bootsock - 6 points (loved the texture of the thick sock in my mouth)
Scandinavian girl’s short, white sneaker sock – 4 points (a nice starter, but a bit bland)
Redhead’s frilly, white ankle sock – 2 points (all presentation; no substance!)
And so the competition is over and the votes have to be tallied up.
My own results (in reverse order) are as follows:
In sixth place, with 14 points - Scandinavian girl’s pink and white sneaker socks.
In fifth place, with 20 points – Red-haired girl’s lacy, white ankle socks.
In fourth place, with 24 points – English goth-girl’s thick, black, scrunched-up bootsocks.
In joint third place (or second place if you are feeling generous), with 34 points each – the Oriental girl’s yellow, spiral-patterned, knee-length bootsocks and the athletic, black girl’s smart, red and white tube socks.
And in first place – my own clear favourite with a massive 42 points – the Indian goddess’s black ankle socks with the smudged, white logos on the insteps!
But will my votes reflect those of the international viewing audience? If not, I shall be whipped at the socked feet of the winner, along with every other slave-judge who failed to identify the winner.
Well…telephone through your vote now!
My fate is in your hands!
The End
So my mistress has once again entered me as a judge in the Eurovision Sock Contest. I am honoured, but at the same time terrified. It is a huge responsibility for a mere footslave such as myself – to have to ‘judge’, and mark, the socks of superior, mistresses live in front of a television audience of millions – it really is an awesome thought!
And I have another reason to be nervous – if my top vote doesn’t concur with that of the television audience at home - in other words if I fail to choose the overall winner – I shall be whipped live on air at the end of the Contest whilst being forced to kneel at the feet of the winner.
I therefore have every right to feel nervous.
We are down to the final 4 rounds of the Contest, and myself and my five fellow, male footslave-judges now have six remaining pairs of female, socked feet to judge. I happen to be the first slave-judge in the line at the start of the competition, and so, as I kneel on the stage with my head humbly bowed at the feet of the first, female competitor, who is sitting above me on a high bar-stool, her feet resting on a metal rim at the base of the stool, I can observe out of the corner of my eye a row of five other pairs of pretty, feminine feet resting on bar stools to my right, with five other kneeling footslave-judges at their respective feet.
We judges shall all have to work our way down the line for each of the four remaining rounds of the contest – judging the young women’s socked feet on firstly ‘General Aesthetics’ i.e. overall appearance (sight); ‘Texture of sock’ (touch); ‘Aroma of sock’ (smell); and finally ‘Flavour of sock’ (taste).
All the female contestants are free, young women in their early twenties. All the male ‘judges’ (myself included) are footslaves in their forties. We know our stuff, but trying to second guess how the television audience will vote is always problematical – given that the audience at home is a mixture of mistresses and slaves, and given also that they can only see the contestants’ feet and the slaves’ reactions to them – the TV audience can’t actually feel, smell or taste the young women’s socked feet as we slave-judges can!
Which is why the first round is always the most critical – trying to judge how the television audience at home will view the overall appearance of the socked feet. Remember – if I don’t choose the overall winner, I shall be whipped at her feet!
Round 1 – General Aesthetics
‘General Aesthetics’. It is, of course, a play on words (‘General Anaesthetic’?) – but for a humble slave-judge such as myself it is no laughing matter. It is arguably the most important round – deciding which feminine sock and shoe, boot or sandal combination looks the most appealing.
This year we have six very different styles and combinations to choose from. The first pair of feminine feet I must judge are the pair resting on the metal base of the first bar stool directly in front of my kneeling face – some lacy, white, cotton ankle socks in a pair of strappy, bright red, high-heeled, peep-toe sandals belonging to a young, white woman with bright, red hair to match her bright, red sandals.
As I focus my attention on the red and white sandal and sock combo, I can’t help feeling that these, pretty, shapely, frilly-ankle-socked feet will go down well with the viewers at home. Socks and heels – always a stunning and exciting combination! Shades of ‘tartiness’? Of arrogance? Of danger perhaps? The seeming purity of the pristine, white socks contrasted with the wanton lustfulness of the spiked-heels? And the wearing of peep-toe sandals with socks is always intriguing for the humble footslave – exactly why has the mistress chosen to wear socks with open-toed sandals at all? Presumably just to humiliate her slave by denying him the sight of her beautiful, painted, bare toes – for she hardly needs to wear socks with such ‘summery’ footwear just to keep her feet warm! If her feet and toes were cold wouldn’t she wear a pair of closed shoes or boots with her pretty, white, lacy socks?
And that lace – that frill around the ankle. It all adds feminine power to the pure, white sock – for it is a clear statement of the limits to which the slave’s eyes can wander. A humble, male footslave must keep his eyes below the frills at the top of his mistress’s ankle socks. They are a reminder to him of the extent of his remit – her lower sock.
Yes – based on overall aesthetics, these are already my favourites, or, at least, I sense that they will be the favourites of the viewing audience. And as I observe some tiny creases and folds in the white, frilly socks around the mistress’s shapely ankle bones I am reinforced in this opinion. The television cameras will no doubt be focusing in on the socks and will have picked up on those endearing little imperfections in the otherwise smart and pristine, white ankle socks, just as I have done.
I am already pretty much convinced that I shall be awarding these white, lacy ankle socks my top marks for appearance – 12 points.
The voting system goes as follows: each slave-judge awards 12 points for the pair of socked feet he deems the best in each round; then 10 points for the second best; 8 points for the third etc. all the way down to 2 points for his least favourite.
Unlike with the Eurovision Song Contest, however, a slave-judge can never award ‘nuls points’ – a slave could never award a mistress no points!
I only get two minutes to study each pair of socked feet, such is the pace of modern, televised shows these days, and so at the blowing of a whistle by the glamorous, evening-gowned and strappy-golden-sandalled, female compere each slave-judge, including myself, has to shuffle on their hands and knees down to the neighbouring bar stool in order to study the next pair of female, socked feet.
I don’t pay much attention to the activities of my six fellow-judges. It’s every male slave-judge for himself in a contest like this. We all have a vested interest in correctly identifying the audience’s choice of winner – for those of us who fail to do so shall, as I have already indicated, be di-vested of our slave-shirts and soundly whipped!
Seated on the second bar stool above me is what appears to be a dark-haired, young woman of oriental appearance wearing knee-length, zip-up, brown leather kitten-heeled boots with yellow, spiral-patterned, knee-length bootsocks protruding out the tops.
It is a bold choice of footwear for the young woman to choose – at least as far as this first round of ‘General Aesthetics’ is concerned - for only the very tops of her pretty, yellow socks are visible to slave-judge and audience. Nevertheless, the distinctive spiral-patterning of the stitching in the socks is extremely eye-catching and quite clever: not only does the slave-judge feel somewhat guilty at having to raise his gaze so high up the young, oriental woman’s brown-leather-booted leg in order to view the tops of her yellow socks, he is also left longing to trace the pattern of the spiral stitching with his slave-nose down the entire length of the sock. That will auger well for the second round – the ‘Texture’ round – when the slave-judges are permitted to feel the superior, young women’s socks with their slave faces and noses.
Yes, this young, oriental woman could be a bit of a dark horse – the inscrutable mysteries (or should that be mistress-eries) of the Far East! Sock largely hidden inside boot – but a lot of sock! Knee-length sock! And bright yellow too!
One to watch!
The blowing of the whistle means that I must reluctantly shuffle down to the next bar stool and the next pair of feminine feet – the feet of a black girl clad in a very sporty pair of bright, white, calf-length tube socks with two fetching, red hoops on each of the elasticated tops, and plain, white keds. The choice of footwear by this young, black woman is very clever, for the white tube socks contrast nicely with the rich blackness of the skin on her shapely calf muscles.
In fact, the white socks probably aren’t so bright as they first appear. It’s important to remember that none of the female contestants will have washed their socks for several days as they will want to make a memorable and lasting impression on the noses of the slave judges when it comes to the ‘Aroma’ round.
Being pathetic footslaves, of course, we will always judge the stinkiest socks to be the best, and the female contestants will go to great lengths to ensure their socks smell – long runs in the park in the days leading up to the contest; workouts in the gym etc. I am sure that this ultra fit and healthy, sporty-looking young black woman will have been working-out, and that her thick tube socks will smell strongly of her precious footsweat when she takes off her keds. Her red and white tube socks not only look great on her beautiful, black legs, they will also feel, smell and taste wonderful.
A strong contender!
The fourth mistress is a beautiful, tall blonde, almost certainly of Scandinavian origins, who is wearing a very fetching pair of short, white sneaker-socks with a pink trim and matching pink and white, lace-up sneakers. She appears to be wearing very short matching pink and white shorts as well, but clearly I am unable to completely confirm that as I am a footslave and must concentrate on the tall, blonde woman’s sneakers and socks, not her well-proportioned legs.
It’s a classic combination always sure to win votes – sneakers and socks – although the length of the socks appears to get shorter and shorter over the years. It is literally just the pink trim and the tiniest slither of white sock that is visible above the upper rim of her pink and white sneakers, and both socks disappear completely at the back of her foot inside the heels of her sneakers!
Again this provides a sense of awe and mystery for the humble footslave-judge – a longing to see the rest of the socks in the knowledge that they are being worn for really one purpose only – to absorb the mistress’s footsweat thereby making her soft, feminine feet even more comfortable inside her soft, feminine sneakers.
Pink and white socks with pink and white sneakers – a girl can’t really go wrong with those!
As far as I’m concerned, however, the fifth pair of feet eclipse all the others that I have been privileged to examine thus far – soft, black ballet flats with bow-shaped laces on the tops, combined with black, cotton ankle socks with a white logo running along the entire length of the young woman’s shapely instep. She appears to be Indian – truly petite compared to the former Scandinavian contestant, yet being seated as she is on a bar-stool high above me she seems like a veritable giantess, as indeed do all the other contestants.
The soft, black ballet-shoe/soft, black ankle sock combo gets me every time! It’s a winner – businesslike yet simultaneously very feminine and ladylike. And this young ‘businesswoman’ is such a tease and a sock-flirt! Her soft, low-cut, flat ballet-style shoe is dangling from her foot, fully exposing her black ankle sock to my close-up view, and in particular that intriguing white logo running along her instep.
It consists of lettering which I can’t quite make out. But that’s not what is so intriguing about it – it’s the fact that the white lettering is smudged; smudged by repeated washing and/or sweat-absorption from the young Asian mistress’s foot. It provides a clear indication of repeated wear – as do the little balls of black, sock lint and the hint of thinning stitching along the bottom edge of the sock. These feminine, black socks are a well-worn and favourite pair – steeped in history; the history of where their owner has been standing, walking and running over many weeks and months, and in the chemicals from the insides of the hot, sweaty boots and shoes she has worn with them.
These are the real, working socks of a real, working woman. They are undoubtedly my personal favourites – but will the television audience think the same? Will they appreciate the flirtatious and well-used, black ankle socks as much as I do?
Finally I find myself kneeling in front of the sixth pair of female socks – thick, black, scrunched-up bootsocks with heavy, ribbed stitching peeping over the tops of a pair of zip-up, block-heeled and round-toed, black leather ankle boots. Once again, it has to be said, the owner is taking a slight risk. Only the tops of the socks are visible for this first ‘aesthetics’ round – and, remember, it is primarily the socks we are judging as opposed to the outer footwear, beautiful and dominant though the ankle boots are.
Having said that, these socks will undoubtedly score well in the ‘Texture’ round as we footslave-judges will be able to bury our noses in the deep creases and folds of the socks. They should smell nice too having been confined inside the young, white woman’s black ankle-boots - probably for several days on the trot! Which is an appropriate turn of phrase given that the young woman looks somewhat ‘horsey’ and ‘snooty’. She, more than the others, appears to be looking down her pierced nose at me like I am some sort of offending dirt attached to the sole of her nice, black ankle boot. Which, of course, I am.
I’m guessing this brunette may be the English contestant.
And so, round 1 is at an end. I now have to write down my marks for each contestant in my slave-judge’s notebook which will be passed to the female adjudicators at the end of the contest. Although my own undoubted favourites in this round were the black ankle socks with the smudged, white logo of the young, Indian mistress, I decide that the television audience is likely to go for the white, lacy socks and red sandals combo of the first contestant and, just between you and me, I therefore vote as follows:
Lacy, white ankle socks and red spike-heeled, peep-toe sandals – 12 points
Black ankle socks with white logos and black ballet-flats – 10 points
Red and white tube socks and plain, white keds – 8 points
Spiral patterned, yellow, knee-length bootsocks and brown, leather, zip-up boots – 6 points
Short pink and white sneaker socks and pink and white sneakers – 4 points
Thick, scrunched-up, black, ankle-length bootsocks and black, block-heeled, round-toed ankle boots – 2 points.
Round 2 – Sock Texture
And so we move on to round two and I am starting this time at the feet of the sixth contestant – the one whom thus far (unbeknown to her – mercifully) I have voted last with only 2 points – the snooty English girl with the thick, black bootsocks and black ankle boots.
She will do better in this round, however, for this is where the boots, shoes and sandals come off and the socks of those female contestants wearing boots are in full view for the first time.
It is also the round where the humble footslave judges get to take off the footwear of whichever female contestant happens to be seated above them at the start of the second round.
Although I voted her in last place in the first round, I feel honoured and privileged to be allowed to divest this haughty young Englishwoman of her black, zip-up ankle boots. Unzipping a young woman’s boots and revealing her hitherto largely hidden bootsocks is always much more of a thrill than removing sandals or slip-on shoes when the socks have already been fully on display. It’s that sense of anticipation – of the unknown. The bootsocks might appear to be plain black in colour judging from the elasticated, scrunched-up tops of the socks, but what if they contain brightly-coloured logos on the insteps (like the Indian girl’s ankle socks – I still can’t get her socks out of my slave-mind), or different coloured, reinforced toe and/or heel sections?
I find my hands are shaking somewhat with the excitement as I unzip the young Englishwoman’s black, leather ankle-boots and gently pull them off to reveal a pair of plain, black bootsocks. No logos! No colours! Just plain black!
My initial disappointment dissipates somewhat, however, the more I study the stitching of the black, ankle-length bootsocks. As on the scrunched-up tops, the thick, ribbed stitching runs all the way down the socks as far as the reinforced toe and heel areas. As I place my slave-nose on her right socked foot in order to conduct the ‘texture’ test, I am therefore able to run my nose quite literally down a thick groove in her sock all the way from the elasticated top to her toes. It feels nice, but not as nice as when I literally bury my footslave-nose in the deep folds of the scrunched-up tops of her socks. As I had earlier anticipated, the softness of the thick socks feels simply wonderful on my nose and face – and, although it is not yet the sock-smelling round, the aroma coming from the sweat-drenched bottoms of her thick, black bootsocks is quite entrancing!
All in all, a nice pair of sweaty bootsocks. ‘Top-ho!’ as the English say!
I next have to move along again to the first pair of socked feet lined up on the stage – the frilly, white ankle socks – now divested by one of my fellow-judges of their tarty, red, peep-toe and spike-heeled sandals.
The white socks look and feel glorious on their own – very thin compared to the thick, black bootsocks I have just been nuzzling, but there is something nice about being able to feel a young woman’s bare foot flexing underneath your nose as you run it along the thin, cotton material of her white sock. Perhaps she is finding it soothing; or perhaps even ticklish having her socked feet ‘nosed’ by a humble footslave? Whichever the case she is clearly finding the experience pleasurable as she seems to push her socked instep forward into my face, and her pleasure is my pleasure!
Speaking of ticklish, the lacy frills of this particular mistress’s socks tickle my nose as I nuzzle them, and for one terrifying moment I think I am about to sneeze! Mercifully I manage to suppress it – sneezing all over a female contestant’s nice, clean, white socks is never a good idea for a footslave-judge!
Next it’s the long, yellow, knee-length, bootsocks with the spiral-patterned stitching. It really is the stitching that sets these socks apart. One could literally close ones eyes and still be able to trace the spiral pattern down the entire length of the sock with ones nose.
I know that for a fact because that’s precisely what I do. It is, after all, the best way to concentrate on the feel and texture of the sock – close your eyes, block off your nose, and just run the sensitive tip of your slave-nose along the spiral grooves of the stitching. It gets a little bit awkward when the spiral pattern wraps around the back of the young oriental woman’s calves, but she appears to help me by twisting her leg around a bit to enable my nose to maintain purchase on the groove in the sock.
Well, it is in the young woman’s own best interests that the slave-judge should enjoy the feel of the back of her sock as well as the front – assuming she wants to win the contest!
The red and white, calf length, tube socks are next – again plenty of thick sock to nuzzle, only this time they are fully pulled-up and smooth on the young black woman’s shapely, athletic-looking shins and calf-muscles. I can’t help myself from tracing my nose around each stretched, red hoop at the top of her socks. I know it will make good television, and it demonstrates that I am taking my judging-role seriously as I need to know whether the smart, red hoops feel any different under my slave nose to the rest of the, otherwise white, socks. Having ‘nosed’ the red hoops I once again find a groove in the thick, white stitching that I can run my nose down all the way to the smelly, reinforced area of the athletic black girl’s sock-covered toes.
I see some yellow and brown staining on the material of the socks immediately beneath her toes. Sweat! The cameras will like that - and the sight of my slave-nose running over the sock sweat.
In contrast to the two previous pairs of socks I am next confronted with the ultra short, pink and white ‘footie’ socks of the tall blonde girl. Although the socks are small, her feet are quite large, so there is more sock material to nose-feel than might at first appear.
Rather like with the frilly, white socks of the first contestant I can feel the muscles in the young Scandinavian woman’s bare, white foot flexing beneath her thin, white sneaker sock. The base of the sock, in particular, feels nice and smooth – lint free, even though my nose causes the sock material to crease and wrinkle somewhat as I run it along the sole of her socked foot, from shapely big toe to equally shapely heel. Is that an area of rough skin I can feel on the base of her heel underneath the thin, white sock?
If so, the tall, blonde Scandinavian mistress will get extra points!
And so finally in this round it’s back to my favourites – the flirtatious black and white, well-worn, ankle socks of the petite, twenty-something, Indian mistress. As I nuzzle the white logo on her shapely instep I wonder what this young woman does for a living? Perhaps an office worker of some description? I am convinced she must, on occasion, wear these socks (and, indeed, in all probability her black ballet-flats with the bow-shaped laces on the tops of the soft, rounded toe areas) to her place of work. These are classic office girl socks – I can almost smell the office on them (although that is for the next round!)
I still can’t make out the wording of the white logo along the Indian girl’s instep, but I am in any case distracted by the delightful feel of the little, rough balls of black sock lint all along the side and bottom of her sock. I make a mental note to try and lick off some of this sock lint when it comes to the sock-tasting round. Being able to savour some of her black sock lint will better enable me to judge the taste of this Indian goddess’s socks!
My voting for this, the sock-texture, round is as follows:
Indian girl’s black and white ankle socks – 12 points
Brunette English girl’s thick, black, scrunched-up, ankle-length bootsocks – 10 points
Oriental girl’s spiral-patterned, yellow, knee-length bootsocks – 8 points
Black girl’s sporty, red and white, calf-length, tube socks – 6 points
Blonde Scandinavian girl’s short, thin, pink and white sneaker socks – 4 points (the feel of her hard skin on the base of her heels through the thin material of her short, sneaker-sock sadly not enough to beat the sporty, black girl’s groovy tube socks)
Red-haired girl’s white, frilly ankle socks – 2 points (they lost points because the frilly lace around her ankles tickled my nose and almost made me sneeze all over them on live television!)
Round 3 – Sock Aroma
I had found it quite difficult not to allow my sense of smell to interfere with my sense of touch during the second round, but now at last we slave-judges were free to audibly sniff the socks of the respective six, beautiful, female finalists with wild abandon!
I have to say I am delighted to be starting with the black and white office socks of the sweet and flirtatious Indian mistress. The compere reminds us judges that we are required to audibly sniff each and every socked foot, and that we must help the viewers at home by demonstrating through our facial expressions our personal footslavish-assessments of the stinkiness of the contestants’ socks – the more pained and disgusted our expressions, the smellier the socks (which is deemed a good thing!)
For my part I am absolutely determined to help my Indian mistress – my favourite – to win this round by feigning total disgust on my face as I sniff the socked instep on her right foot. In actuality the sock doesn’t smell all that bad – but, being so obviously well-worn, it looks smelly, so my turned up nose for the benefit of the cameras helps to reinforce the illusion for the viewing public back home.
I find myself wishing I could sniff the insides of the young Indian woman’s discarded, soft, leather ballet flats, as I am convinced the sweat from her feet will be deeply ingrained in the inner lining. Her shoes, like her socks, have the appearance of being well-worn – lots of tiny creases in the fabric of the soft leather, and the black inner linings do look suitably stained.
But sadly it is only the smell of the socks that I am allowed to judge, and so I make the most of the two minutes I am allocated to smelling the Indian, office girl’s sweaty, black socks whilst she is still wearing them.
I may be imagining it, but I’m sure I can feel some tiny balls of sock-lint being vacuumed up the insides of my slave-nostrils as I forcibly sniff! What bliss, to think that this superior young woman’s dirty sock lint is inside my humble nose!
Next in line, of course, are the thick, black, scrunched-up, ankle-length bootsocks of the imperious English girl. I had noticed that one of my fellow judges had appeared to really enjoy sniffing these particular socks, even letting out a little groan of pleasure mixed with disgust at the smell (something which is actually against the competition rules – slave-judges are not allowed to speak or to utter any sounds – but I don’t think anyone will be lodging a formal complaint on this occasion!)
As I bury my nose in the folds around the toe area of the English mistress’s right sock I can understand why my footslave-judge colleague felt compelled to moan – the sock smells truly rank! But then, why should we be surprised at that! The sock has, after all, in all probability been confined inside the young woman’s ankle boot for several, consecutive days – and deliberately so. She has deliberately cultivated this cheesy aroma to impress the slave-judges and to leave them with a lasting memory of her.
My slave-nose, for one, will not quickly forget the smell of haughty, young Englishwoman’s black-socked foot!
At least, not until my sniff of the next pair of socked feet – back to the start of the line and the redhead’s white, lacy socks.
I’m afraid to have to say that this young woman has rather let herself down in this round – her socks don’t smell at all! Presumably she didn’t have the foresight to wear closed boots or shoes with her white, thin cotton, lacy, ankle-length socks over the past few days, and instead has been running around (or more likely out clubbing) in her bright red, peep-toe, high-heeled sandals – sandals which, sadly, allow her feet to breathe – just what you don’t want when you are taking part in a sock-smelling competition!
Gallantly, I try to help her by feigning disgust as I audibly sniff the reinforced stitching covering the toes on her outstretched, right foot – but I don’t think I’m fooling anyone, least of all myself!
And so it’s with some relief that I move on to the spiral-patterned, yellow kneesocks of the oriental girl. Inevitably, because her socks have been encased inside her brown, knee-length, zip-up, leather boots for so long, even if the top half of her socks don’t smell sweaty, the lower parts do – the parts covering her actual feet and toes. She kindly wiggles her yellow-socked toes to help release some of the stink up my nose, and it is a good sign that my slave-nose doesn’t actually have to touch her sock to be enveloped in its cheesy, vinegary aroma.
My nose is in seventh heaven!
It’s the red and white tube socks of the next contestant - the sporty, black girl –that I am really looking forward to, however. I had already noted in the previous round that there were visible signs of yellowy-brown sweat staining on the undersides of the toes on the young, black woman’s otherwise pristine, white socks, and my nose accordingly heads straight for the stain – like a bee to honey; like a moth to the flame!
Yes! The familiar (for a footslave) aroma of stale footsweat. Unlike her red-haired counterpart, this female contestant has undoubtedly prepared well for the sock-sniffing element to the Eurovision Sock Contest! She must have been working out in the gym, and/or running mini-marathons, in her red and white tube socks and white, canvas keds – for her sports socks smell as a young woman’s sports socks should: they stink!
Genuine disgust is etched on my face. I do hope the cameras are picking this up! This young woman is the clear winner in this round – even though I still have one last pair of feminine socks to sniff – the short, thin, pink and white sneaker socks of the tall, Scandinavian girl.
My main impression of her socks is that they smell of the rubber lining of her sneakers – hot and warm, yes, but not particularly sweaty! It’s a bit of a disappointment really, especially after the pungent, vinegary smell of the black, female athlete’s tube socks.
Not much more I can say really!
And so my voting in the third ‘aroma’ round is as follows:
Black girl’s tube socks – 12 points
Indian girl’s black and white ankle socks – 10 points
Oriental girl’s spirally, yellow knee-socks – 8 points
English girl’s scrunched-up, black bootsocks – 6 points
Redhead’s frilly, white ankle socks – 4 points
Scandinavian girl’s short, pink and white sneaker socks – 2 points.
Round 4 – Sock Flavour
And so to the fourth and final round, when the slave-judges are afforded the inestimable privilege of actually peeling off the contestant’s socks with our slave-teeth and placing them in our mouths in order to taste them.
It’s a round which, in some respects I’ve been dreading – not because I don’t relish the taste of a superior, young woman’s dirty socks in my slave-mouth; far from it! It’s just that I don’t relish the taste of another slave’s saliva on a mistress’s sock – and, inevitably, the only socks I can be guaranteed sucking on first before any of the other slave-judges are those of the contestant in front of me at the start of this round (i.e. the Scandinavian sneaker-socked girl) – although in all likelihood the fellow slave-judge in front of me will only taste one of the adjacent contestant’s socks , leaving me with the hope that I will also be the first to taste at least one of my beloved Indian mistress’s, well-worn black and white ankle socks! The very thought of another slave getting to suck on her sock-sweat before me fills me with slavish envy, a most unbecoming emotion in a slave!
But for now I have first to suck on one of the blonde, Scandinavian girl’s short, white sneaker socks.
I must first peel off both her socks from her pretty, if quite large, feet. As I have already indicated, slave-judges are required to peel off the lady-contestants’ socks with their teeth, so I probably have the easiest job of all my fellow judges – gently wrapping my lips around the toe ends of my blonde, Scandinavian mistress’s ultra-short, pink and white sneaker-socks and pulling them of with my slave-mouth.
Imagine having to pull off the oriental girl’s yellow kneesocks with your teeth! Much of your sock-tasting time would be wasted just trying to remove the socks!
I put the Scandinavian girl’s left sock in my mouth and suck on it. A bit bland – a little bit salty, but really not much of a taste if truth be told; just the flavour of soft, white cotton. I also like a young woman’s sock to really fill my mouth – and this sock just isn’t big enough for my tastes – despite the young woman’s relatively large feet!
Next I move down to the Indian girl’s feet. I can’t help noticing that her bare, brown feet are particularly pretty – her toenails, for example, are painted bright purple. I like a girl who makes her personal footslave paint her toenails and then cover up his painstaking work with her socks!
It is quite clear to me which of the discarded, crumpled up, black and white ankle socks the preceding slave-judge has tasted, for I can see the dark saliva stains on the black fabric of the relevant sock. I therefore pick up the other, as yet unsampled sock, and place it in my mouth.
It tastes much more salty than the Scandinavian girl’s white sneaker-sock, but to be fair that may be because I a sucking much harder on he Indian girl’s sock – I am determined to suck off the little balls of sweaty, black sock lint; to savour them on my tongue before swallowing them – for this is the office sock-lint of a superior Indian goddess and it truly belongs in my inferior mouth and stomach! I feel I could survive on nothing but her sock sweat and sock lint! A footslave doesn’t need much to sustain and nourish him!
It is food from the sole!
All too soon I have to extract the Indian girl’s well-worn, but now pre-washed dirty sock from my slave-mouth, in order to move on to the next mistress’s socks – the thick, black bootsocks of the English girl.
These socks fill the mouth nicely. Even just one bootsock is enough to provide a humble, sock-sucking footslave with an overflowing mouthful of girl-sock, and the soft texture of the thick stitching feels nice on my slave-tongue. Unfortunately, the sock doesn’t taste quite as salty or as vinegary as I had been expecting – possibly because it was already quite damp when I picked it up. One of my fellow foot-judges has already enjoyed a mouthful of the English girl’s socksweat!
On a side issue I notice that the English girl’s toenails are painted black, and I begin to wonder if she is a goth.
If so, she gets extra points in my book!
And so from goth to tart! Perhaps a little bit unkind, but the redhead’s initial combo of bright, red, spike-heeled, open-toed sandals and frilly, white ankle socks has given me the impression right from the start of a certain ‘tartiness’. A cheap frill, so to speak. The fact that her toenails are painted bright red to match her red high-heeled sandals somehow only serves to reinforce my first, in no way meant to be judgemental, impressions.
Not that her white, lacy ankle sock tastes at all ‘tarty’ in my mouth as I suck on it. I hadn’t expected it to – after all, it hadn’t smelt tarty either. The sweat hasn’t been sucked out of this sock by the preceding judges – there never was any sweat to begin with!
Disappointing!
I am becoming quite the sock-tasting critic and connoisseur as I move on to the yellow, knee-length bootsocks of the oriental mistress. Being a knee-length sock, not all of it fits into my slave-mouth – big though that is! I therefore look ridiculous as the upper end of the chosen kneesock hangs out of my mouth as I suck on the more flavoursome toe and foot end of the sock.
It’s a funny thing, but one can almost taste the different colours in young women’s socks! I suppose there could be something in the various chemicals of the different-coloured dyes, but it’s probably just a figment of my footslave-imagination. Nevertheless, I can’t help feeling that the yellow sock tastes somewhat…well...’lemony’!
Is that possible? Could it even be that the oriental mistress has sprayed some lemon-scented perfume on her yellow socks to impress the footslave-judges? Or are my taste buds just becoming confused with the mingling aftertastes of 5 very different feminine socks swirling around on my stupid, ignorant footslave-palate?
Whatever, I find the oriental girl’s yellow kneesock quite refreshing in my mouth – almost like a lemony-flavoured pudding after the main course.
And after the pudding, of course, comes the cheese and biscuits – the cheese being the cheesy, sweaty taste of the beautiful, young black woman’s tube sock; the biscuits being the little bits of black toe-jam that I am sure I can feel coming off her red and white tube sock and onto my tongue as I suck voraciously on the last remaining sweat in her already well-sucked sock!
And so to my final round of votes:
Oriental girl’s ‘lemony-flavoured’ socks – 12 points (I do have a sweet tooth for a sweet sock!)
Indian girl’s lint-covered black and white ankle sock – 10 points (an excellent main course! My compliments to the Indian chef!)
Black girl’s cheesy, tube sock – 8 points (sweaty cheese and chewy, toe-jam flavoured biscuits – a nice way to finish off a meal!)
English girl’s thick, black bootsock - 6 points (loved the texture of the thick sock in my mouth)
Scandinavian girl’s short, white sneaker sock – 4 points (a nice starter, but a bit bland)
Redhead’s frilly, white ankle sock – 2 points (all presentation; no substance!)
And so the competition is over and the votes have to be tallied up.
My own results (in reverse order) are as follows:
In sixth place, with 14 points - Scandinavian girl’s pink and white sneaker socks.
In fifth place, with 20 points – Red-haired girl’s lacy, white ankle socks.
In fourth place, with 24 points – English goth-girl’s thick, black, scrunched-up bootsocks.
In joint third place (or second place if you are feeling generous), with 34 points each – the Oriental girl’s yellow, spiral-patterned, knee-length bootsocks and the athletic, black girl’s smart, red and white tube socks.
And in first place – my own clear favourite with a massive 42 points – the Indian goddess’s black ankle socks with the smudged, white logos on the insteps!
But will my votes reflect those of the international viewing audience? If not, I shall be whipped at the socked feet of the winner, along with every other slave-judge who failed to identify the winner.
Well…telephone through your vote now!
My fate is in your hands!
The End
