Sock Sycophant

‘How has your day been, slave? Have you seen lots of nice socks?’

‘Oh pray, pretty mistress, if it pleases you pretty customer-mistress Ms Mukta Madam, truly this slave has been blessed by his customers’ socks today, madam, if you would be so kind and understanding, thank you for asking, madam.’

‘What were the best socks, slave?’

‘Oh mistress, oh pray pretty mistress, if it pleases you pretty mistress, present socks excepted, the best socks this slave has seen today were the black anklesocks of a pretty black mistress, madam, as they had two thin red stripes at the tops, mistress, and they were creased and folded inside the customer-mistress’s ankleboots, mistress, if you would be so kind and understanding to your public footservant, madam?’

‘Ha! Ha! And did she let you nose her socks while you were lickshining her boots, pafetic slave?’

‘Oh pray, mistress, oh no mistress! This slave could never be deemed worthy enough to nose his customers' socks, begging your pardon miss, since he is nothing but a disgusting, queer sock-fancy, mistress, and socks are better than him, mistress!’

‘Ha! Ha! That’s very true, slave! But tell me, you said your black customer-mistress’s socks were the best socks ‘present socks excepted’. Why do you think my socks are even better than hers? After all, my socks are just plain grey, and don’t have any red lines at the tops?’

‘Oh pray, pretty mistress, if you will forgive me pretty mistress, your plain grey socks are the best socks of all because you are the most beautiful young woman in the universe, madam, if you would be so kind and understanding, miss, please don’t beat me miss.’

‘Ha! Ha! Yes I am beautiful, aren’t I slave? So tell me, what is more important – my socks, or your life?’

‘Oh mistress! Oh joy, mistress! Your socks are infinitely more important than my life, mistress, since they are the socks of a beautiful goddess, mistress, if you would be so kind and understanding to an humble slave at your mercy, miss?’

‘Ha! Ha! You’re truly pafetic, slave! You deserve to be whipped, and that!’

‘Yes, mistress. Thanking you kindly, mistress! Please don’t whip me mistress. Truly this slave is a coward, miss, and fears the almighty sting of the whip, mistress!’

‘Ha! Ha! Shut up now, slave, and lickshine my sneakers clean. I wanna be able to see my face in them. AND DON’T TOUCH MY SOCKS!’

‘No mistress! I mean, yes mistress! Forgive me, mistress. I’m stupid mistress!’

The slave does well to sycophantically extol the virtues of his pretty customer-mistress’s plain grey socks, since she is holding a whip!













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