Unworthy
Not only is the dumb ornamental footkisser unworthy of having any kind of conversation with his customer-mistress; he is likewise unworthy to study her sock – hence she refrains from hitching up her jean hem to reveal her brightly-coloured, red and yellow, stripy towelling sock to him as he kiss-respects her street-soiled sneaker.
If he was fortunate enough to be her personal footservant, he undoubtedly would get to not just see and study, but also kiss, nuzzle, smell and feel her socks, as his duties would include:
· Fetching his mistress’s chosen socks for the day in the morning from her sock drawer
· Pulling said socks onto her feet
· Following her to socked heel about the house
· Straightening out any creases in her socks before donning her sneakers onto her socked feet
· Removing her sneakers and respectfully kiss-greeting her socks when she returns home from work
· Massaging and sniffing her sweaty-socked feet as she relaxes on the sofa in the arms of her manly husband in front of the television
· Removing her socks from her feet before she retires to bed to make love to her husband
· Sleeping with her discarded socks on his upturned face all night
· Mouthwashing her socks first thing in the morning, before she arises and orders him to bring her a fresh pair of socks
But no – being a public footservant the dumb ornamental footkissser is denied all of those privileges, and even a furtive glimpse of her sock inside her sneaker as he lips her dirty sneaker-toe is withheld from him.
What a loser!