Ledge

One of the reasons I am grateful that my customers have a ledge on which to rest their foot in front of my face as they lord it over me, is that it invariably means I get to see a slither of their sock - even a so-called 'no show' sock - as I go about my humble business of kiss-respecting or lickshining their outer footwear. And a customer's sock is truly a thing of greatness and beauty because:

• It absorbs their precious footsweat inside their shoe or boot
• There is more intelligence in a single droplet of a customer's footsweat that seeps from his or her superior footpores than there is in my whole inferior slave body
• A customer's sock is therefore more intelligent than me
• It is therefore better than me, and certainly more high-class

Yes, it is truly an honour for the likes of me - a mere public humble-head - to be so up close and personal with my superb customers' glorious socks.

Take the extremely bright young woman in front of me right now. She is wearing grey, turtle-themed socks inside her brown leather loafers. The turtle-patterns in the socks give me something more to think about, other than the magnificent cotton stitching and the bobbling, as I kiss-respect the brown leather shoe that hides most of the sock. I can even just make out the elasticated top of the short, grey sock beneath the customer-mistress's raised trouser-hem, and a crease at the very back of her sock!

As I said, it is an enormous privilege for me to be permitted to see anything of her sock and so I count my footslave blessings as her dainty foot remains resting on the ledge for several minutes whilst she enjoys humbling me in public.

Praise be to her sock!