Insider Knowledge

Local resident Ms Karen madam often pops by me on the public stairwell on her way home from work for a quick lick and a shine of her office boots. At such times I have the added indignity of knowing that her plain grey cotton and heavily creased bootsocks will have been on her feet inside those warm boots for more than 10 hours now. Plus I am aware that she has a verruca on her right foot inside her sock. I know that because she brazenly told me so the other day.

Oh if only I were Ms Karen madam’s personal, household footservant! Then I would be able to lick her verruca for her in an effort to try and soften, and eventually remove it, with my bootleathery tongue. That would be such an honour!













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